Sir Arthur Sullivan and the Lady

Arthur Sullivan’s early love affair with Rachel Scott Russell was doomed by “[her] vain mother who thought the young composer not good enough for her daughter to take in marriage.” (B.W. Findon, Sir Arthur Sullivan, p. 170)

He never married.

But he did have a life-long friend and lover—the American socialite and accomplished amateur contralto, Mary Frances “Fanny” Ronalds. She was considered a great beauty, with small and exquisitely regular features, abundant dark hair of a shade called châtain foncé (deep chestnut), a generous smile and beautiful teeth.

Born in Boston, Massachusetts in 1839, by age 20 the beautiful Mary Frances Carter was already known for her singing ability when she married Pierre Lorillard Ronalds, who later was called the “Father of American Coaching” (i.e., horse-drawn carriage-driving).  She gave excellent parties, including a cotillion dinner at Delmonico’s where everyone had to dress in costume. The young Mrs. Ronalds appeared as “Euterpe, the muse of Music,” in a white satin gown embroidered with part of the score of Verdi’s Un ballo in maschera. On her head she wore a tiara decorated with a harp, from which flickered real flames fed by a tiny gas cylinder hidden in her hairdo.

In 1867, she separated from her husband and moved with her three children to Paris, where she joined the court circles of the pleasure-loving Empress Eugénie and Napoleon III. That was where she first met Arthur Sullivan, during one of his travels during that time.

The Second Empire fell in 1871, and Mrs. Ronalds moved with her children to Algeria and then to London, where she soon became known as an elegant society hostess and one of the many “friends” of the skirt-chasing Prince of Wales (later King Edward VII) and had a relationship with Lord Randolph Churchill. Those liaisons notwithstanding, Fanny became friends with Lady Randolph Churchill (the former Jennie Jerome) and was also friendly with Queen Victoria and Queen Alexandra.

Not long after she arrived in London, Fanny and Arthur fell in love. She was three years older than Sullivan, still in her early thirties and beautiful, with a strong personality. Sullivan called her “the best amateur singer in London.” She often performed Sullivan’s songs, especially “The Lost Chord,” singing it both in private and in public, often with Sullivan accompanying her.

She even attended the auditions which were held at the Savoy, according to Hesketh Pearson in Gilbert and Sullivan, who noted, “she would sit in a box, Sullivan in the pit, Carte in the gallery and [conductor Frank] Cellier in the orchestra, and the nervous singers had to remember that hers was the casting vote.”

Pearson added, “[Sullivan] followed her advice on most matters with a whole-heartedness seldom displayed by husbands when proffered counsel by their wives.”

Their relationship deepened after the deaths of Sullivan’s brother Fred in 1877 and his beloved mother in 1882. Sullivan became close with Fanny’s children and parents, especially after his brother Fred’s family moved to America in 1883.

But of course, they could never marry, or even publicly acknowledge their relationship.  Fanny was still married to Ronalds, despite their separation – though the 1857 Matrimonial Causes Act gave women limited access to divorce, the scandal meant instant social annihilation – and the social stigma of marrying a divorcee would have ruined Sullivan’s career.  So in public, Sullivan called her Mrs. Ronalds. In his private diary, he referred to her as L.W. (Little Woman) or D.H. (Dear Heart, maybe?), with little asterisks showing how many times they’d made love on each stolen night they spent together.

Though their physical relationship seems to have faded out in their later years together (no more little asterisks in the diary), Fanny was Arthur Sullivan’s constant companion until his death in 1900. When he died, he left her the autograph manuscript of “The Lost Chord,” along with other bequests. That manuscript copy was buried with her, at her request, when she died in 1916, at the age of 76. She is buried in the Brompton Cemetery in London.

In an inscription to a wreath that she sent to the funeral, Queen Victoria’s daughter Princess Louise described Fanny Ronalds as “one of the kindest and most unselfish of women.”

I think Arthur Sullivan and Fanny Ronalds would have made delightful dinner companions! Both were clever and witty and talented and kind.

If you could have anyone from any time and place join you for dinner, who would you choose? Let me know in the comments!